To be a girl boss, you need patience, hope and creativity. It’s no specific definition and way on how to achieve being one.
Follow along with some tips on how to start your journey on becoming a girl boss. Women are not the only ones who can follow along on this guide.
This information is opinion based, what works for me may not work for you.
Step 1 : Don’t listen to men or others
Men are not that evil but when it comes to this journey, listening to them may not be the best idea. This journey is about you becoming your best and highest self. Do not let anyone stop you or discourage you from chasing your dreams.
Step 2 : Do that “scary thing”
I often feel as women and as humans were often taught to stay in our comfort zone. While the comfort zone can be the safest place, it also can be the most daunting for our growth.
Don’t know who needs to hear it but take that job, create that blog, Youtube or even that vacation. You deserve a chance to do the things you REALLY want to do.
Step 3 : Stop caring about what society says about your outfit
A big part of being a girl boss is feeling and looking like one for yourself. Stop worrying about what your Instagram followers may think regarding your style or what your coworkers may think. Family opinions do not matter as well, especially if you think they dress a mess. Wear that bold jewelry, that big chunky loud sweater. Those pink boots with the fur trim. WEAR what you want.
Step 4 : Spoil yourself
Take yourself on dates to Target or to the coffee shop. Buy yourself those flowers, Kroger has some for $6.00. Spend money on yourself, its not only rewarding but it makes you feel good.
Splurge on that hand bag, that coat or those pairs of shoes. Don’t go too crazy now, think logically but do something that puts a smile on your face.
Step 5 : Start that hobby
Want to learn how to sew? Go on Youtube or Google and find those tutorials. Grab a journal, take notes, write down ideas, lists and things you inspire to create.
Joann Fabrics offers free and paid online classes for sewing projects.
Start that hobby you wanted to when money was tight or one that genuinely interests you.
Even if it fails because it might, at-least you tried.
Step 6 : Cut off toxic relationships
Friendships and romantic relationships can take a toll on you if they do not have a relevancy in your life. Romantic relationships with unfair or toxic partners can bring you down instead of up. Let that woman or man go if they are not pleasing you mentally, physically or emotionally.
People around you should encourage you and make you feel welcomed and good. If you ever start to feel down around someone, I believe that your body and mind is telling you that this person brings you down. If you feel uncomfortable or as if your true self is hiding then it may be best to leave that friendship alone.
It’s hard to cut off friends especially if you develop a codependency on them and hate to be alone.
“Sometimes though it’s a better comfort in being alone than being with people that make you feel alone” – Chandra Alilijah
I have been in a couple friendships where I would say something and feel myself arguing my stance than just having a conversation. Nothing is wrong with a friendly debate but why everything I say makes you question it. Why am I constantly hiding my accomplishments from my own friends? Why am I constantly feeling I can’t say this or that because it may offend their insecurities but they have no problem making me feel less?
Moments like that made me realize some people just are not meant to be in your life and it’s okay to let them go. You find better peace, in just being yourself with a group of people who understand you rather than a group of people who don’t.
Plus it’s just better when no one is giving their unwanted negative opinions.
Step 7 : Start showing up as the person you want to be
So many people live their life as what society deems as “correct”. When society literally doesn’t even know what’s right or wrong.
Stop trying to be someone else, that Instagram model may appear as the “it girl” but she could be struggling with anxiety, body image problems and all other kind of things. Not saying all people on social media are living a false life because some people are genuinely happy. What I am saying is don’t think that everything you see is what it seems.
Some people only “live” on social media. Their followers are the only people in their life that give them attention and that can deter their persona on social media. That’s why YOU, need to just be yourself.
Who cares if you’re 23 and still like Barbie dolls, who cares if you have a muffin top but want to wear crop tops. Who cares if you only have 200 followers on Instagram. As long as it makes you comfortable and bring you some sort of individuality it’s totally fine.
Now I will say when you show up as yourself, people start to talk because they could be jealous or confused as to who you are. Due to now everyone just trying to be the same thing.
“I don’t care about people calling me weird, or whatever else they think. Chandra is me, and Chandra is who I will die being. My truest self while wearing my favorite outfit” – Chandra Alilijah
It’s not an easy journey but just do what you want, be creative, be crazy, be wild, be quiet, be mysterious, be the main character, be YOU.
Step 8 : Money can’t make a girl boss
I do not believe that you need “money” to be a girl boss. Money helps a girl boss with her needs but don’t let that be the thing holding you back.
Being a girl boss is your mindset, how you carry yourself, how you treat others as well. The material things just glam you up.
Step 9 : No one can teach you
Everyone’s girl boss route is different. Some may start tomorrow, or next year and that’s fine. This guide may be stupid for some and good for others which is also fine. Everyone’s path is different path and special for them.
Plus you create your own path and don’t be afraid to just be you while completing that path.
For some more tips on how to get into self care check out this blog post.
Below is a word search puzzle created for the girl bosses who like affirmations. Keep this fun and handy friend alongside with you on your journey.