Am I a content creator, or am I leaning more into blogging?
What’s going on? I went private on Instagram, haven’t posted in a few weeks, and deleted TikTok from my phone, with occasional brand posts.
Am I overwhelmed? Am I tired? Am I returning?
Let’s Get Into It
The start of DiaryofChan
I created Chandra Alilijah, my blog, in the summer of 2018. It began with a completely different name and was supposed to be an article portfolio for school.
Over time, I began to use it like a regular blog, talking about music, school, and fashion.
I created an Instagram account for it specifically, but deleted it to create DiaryofChan, a new account geared toward fashion and lifestyle.
My journey in “content” actually began when I was a journalism student at Michigan State. I created articles, podcasts, and learned the basics of Photoshop.
I never wanted to become a content creator.
However, after my grandma passed away in 2022, I found myself needing something to distract me. Something to help me build my personal brand and not feel constrained to only journalism. I realized I wanted to do a passion project. One that was fun, groovy, and allowed me to express myself.
I’ve always enjoyed fashion and wanted something where I could show my style, my creations, and use the skills I’ve gathered to do so.
So, what happened
I saw myself creating fashion looks, GRWMS, going to fashion shows, events, and truly embarking on a very cool journey.
I haven’t had my viral moment, but I’ve been able to work with brands and create content that’s been pretty dope. The journey has been telling; it’s been challenging but also rewarding.
Has it been a breeze? No, I’ve learned not every room needs my creativity; some rooms I wasn’t ready for, and I don’t need to know everyone to make a big impact. I’ve also grown out of love with posting, while I love creating, social media is too cookie-cutter sometimes. Many are striving to go viral and become big-name creators, but are falling into the trap of lacking individuality.
It’s not easy to be “original” on social media because no matter what, it seems like you’re trying to prove a point. I am over that. I don’t have any more points to prove. I know I am talented, and I can create organically. Why am I still busting my butt trying to prove to these brands, “Here, I am the cheaper option! Give me that free product!”
Over time, I realized that maybe going viral isn’t in my cards, maybe my calling is somewhere else. It’s time to focus on what the brand is – 6:23 Detroit Shop and the blog.
That doesn’t mean DiaryofChan is OVER, but sometimes I want to post online without feeling like it’s a strategy. Just me, being a 25-year-old who’s not trying to sell you something, either. I have other platforms for that.
I had already said that when I became a mutha, the DiaryofChan era was coming to a close because I don’t want to raise my kids online. Plus, at some point, I believe that chasing an internet career gets played out. That sounds harsh, but it’s my opinion. SIDE NOTE: I AM NOT PREGNANT, JUST FORESHADOWING.
At 35, I don’t want to be a social media star, a blogger – yes, but I don’t see myself posting consistently, forcing my life on a bunch of people who I don’t really wanna know at all.
Sounds harsh, but it’s my opinion.
It’s like the playground
Social media has its pros and cons. I truly believe you can build something organic if you really want to, whether it’s an influencer career or a brand. However, I don’t agree with it becoming your entire life. You shouldn’t allow it to consume you, build your personality, or become something you’re not. You’ve let the machine win again.
If you’ve been reading my blogs, you know how I feel about the machine.
My journey began with a global following, content creators, and influencers from all over the world, including New York, Paris, and Lagos. I was able to connect with a lot of women, but then I realized, how are we going to influence anyone if we’re all each other’s followers? There are only so many fire emojis we can send; the comments started to feel robotic, not real.
I unfollowed them. “Girl, I love this” was starting to feel performative, and my page went into a state of stagnation for growth.
It became more local, more creators in my area, connecting at local events. Which felt real, until you realize your city is very new in the content creator scene, and everyone wants to know each other, but not really support each other. They want to know you, some genuinely, some not.
I saw myself constantly feeling like, “Do I belong here? Can I trust you? Now, you know that’s my lingo, are you trying to be me now? I guess you’re okay, but dang, you never support me as I support you.”
This is a game I am no longer playing.
The rebrand
It’s not one. I am just not focusing on becoming this big-time content creator anymore because it was never in my calling. Or maybe just not right now.
I am a creator offline; I have my own business creating ideas and products from scratch. I am a blogger and a writer, and I don’t have to play by the social media playground rules. My career made a pit stop on social media, and I’ve had a great time, but being a journalist got me in so many of the rooms anyway.
“How can you leave something you built so organically?”
I am not leaving, but I can’t afford to, as a creative, base my career on Instagram anymore. I think there is power in leaning on my business, my blog, and knowing they were the foundation of my start, and leveraging what I’ve learned from every door or opportunity as motivation for what I can do.
DiaryofChan began in 2022. It’s been four years, and in those years, I have learned A LOT, experienced a lot. I am grateful, but I can’t allow an algorithm to determine my worth because that’s not fair to my work, and I know that God has positioned me for more.
As a creative, you gotta find that balance. I am still going to post, and maybe it’s a good thing I never went viral. Does that play a factor in how I feel in 2026, maybe, but I know that just because I never went viral doesn’t determine my work, the creative aspects that I have done. I was still able to show up as Chandra Alilijah, the blogger in so many spaces, which was a blessing.
Maybe it’s time to go on other platforms, I am.
It’s just now, my focus is on building longevity, holding some moments in my life for privacy, occasionally going private because I don’t want eyes on me.
I want to be able to enjoy the rest of my 20s without them feeling like I got something to prove to the world because I feel all of my teen years and young adult days have felt like a big, “THIS IS CHANDRA FLEMING, ACCEPT HER!”
Chandra accepts her, so I don’t need the validation.
To that young creator
Create because you want to and always think about the longevity.
Maybe I am just not in love with showing all these parts of my life, or doing those GRWMs on Instagram right now. Maybe I truly need to use another platform, I am. This isn’t the end of Chandra Alilijah; we’re already showing up in other spaces for longevity.
It’s redefining how I want to show up to the world and protecting our identity and creativity at the same time.
Social media content creation isn’t for the weak. While yeah, it’s free to post your life and have fun while doing so, be certain about your why. Maybe posting as a consumer is the better option; know your purpose.
I think one of the biggest tasks I did while becoming an online creator that I can attest to today and say it really helped was writing down the creator I was and the creator I wasn’t. I set a lot of guidelines and goals for myself to help me stay on target.
It’s not the end. It’s a restructure, and a time for me to enjoy my life for a bit without the goal being CONTENT because everything is not content. I truly would rather blog right now and build 6:23; they deserve my love.
Be intentional.
With love,
C.Alilijah
Wait, what does this mean for the “social club”?
Hehe.