{"id":9667,"date":"2026-08-28T06:23:00","date_gmt":"2026-08-28T10:23:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/?p=9667"},"modified":"2026-08-31T11:10:52","modified_gmt":"2026-08-31T15:10:52","slug":"why-are-you-single-for-the-last-time-by-c-alilijah","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/28\/why-are-you-single-for-the-last-time-by-c-alilijah\/","title":{"rendered":"Why are you single? For the last time by C.Alilijah"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;You&#8217;re very attractive; why are you single?&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">*plays &#8220;Contagious&#8221; by Young Thug. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>Let&#8217;s Get Into It<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Nah, for real <\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;Where is your ring?&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s at the store, to my knowledge.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;ve said it a million times, why I am single but being asked out loud hit different. It made me feel like something was wrong. Am I too lonely?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Should my dating history be more intriguing?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I don&#8217;t know. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I don&#8217;t think so.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\"> Why am I single?<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Is it a strict program?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Chandra is single because the men are icky! <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That&#8217;s too blunt. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I&#8217;ve met some okay guys, some childish boys, but have yet to meet a grown man with good intentions. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The men who&#8217;ve tried to become suitors are not well qualified to continue the position. They forget it costs $0 to be natural; stop pretending.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Or stop trying to play Mr. Nice Guy when you&#8217;re really a dog. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am single because I don&#8217;t want to date just anybody. I am single because I have zero tolerance for a man using me for sexual advances and casual hookups. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">My body is precious, and can&#8217;t be touched by the wrong man. I don&#8217;t engage in casualities. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am seeking longevity, so no, I don&#8217;t want to hang out in your car. We&#8217;re grown. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Recommended Posts<\/h2>\n\n\n<ul class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__list wp-block-latest-posts is-layout-flow wp-block-latest-posts-is-layout-flow\"><li><a class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__post-title\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/09\/01\/cozy-szn-2026-featuring-c-alilijah\/\">Cozy Szn 2026 featuring C.Alilijah<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__post-title\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/31\/the-fall-fashion-guide-by-c-alilijah\/\">The fall fashion guide by C.Alilijah<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__post-title\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/30\/i-date-black-men-by-c-alilijah\/\">I date Black men by C.Alilijah<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__post-title\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/29\/i-made-0-at-my-yard-sale-by-c-alilijah\/\">I made $0 at my yard sale by C.Alilijah<\/a><\/li>\n<li><a class=\"wp-block-latest-posts__post-title\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/28\/why-are-you-single-for-the-last-time-by-c-alilijah\/\">Why are you single? For the last time by C.Alilijah<\/a><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">Exploring the fruits<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I tried to be adventurous for research purposes and talk to a man who wasn&#8217;t black, and that was not for me. The cultural differences were intriguing, but his stereotypical mask of Black women was evident. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">We&#8217;re not going to throw you sex because you think your savvy accent and kind words make me want to drop my drawers. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Very honest of me, right? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The exotic fruit always seems refreshing because it&#8217;s something new, but the conversation was just too flat to me. It was very surface-level and boring. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I don&#8217;t need a man over-complimenting me and just agreeing for the sake of &#8220;I secretly want to sleep with you, but I gotta pretend to be nice so I can get inside&#8221;. That&#8217;s the oldest trick in the book, and it&#8217;s interesting when you expose yourself with your promiscuous ways. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s in the slick comments you deem as flirty and casual that I can hear the undertone, &#8220;he just wants to sleep with me,&#8221; because why can&#8217;t we just sit in the coffee shop and enjoy the coffee? Why do we have to go back to the car for a more &#8220;intimate conversation?&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>I don&#8217;t know you.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you&#8217;ve been reading my blog the past few days, you can tell that situation really bothered me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Talking to a non-Black man was lowkey horrible. I didn&#8217;t have expectations, I was completing research, and my results were very typical. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">He didn&#8217;t understand me. And I don&#8217;t think he would&#8217;ve ever, and I saw myself losing Chan if I would&#8217;ve continued to keep on the performance of dating said man. Dealing with his mischievous ways. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I wasn&#8217;t turned on; I was actually disgusted by the forced complimenting and wanted to stop being called a &#8220;cutie&#8221;. I am 26, not 16. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Or maybe I just didn&#8217;t like him when he sent this selfie video, and I realized, &#8220;Girl, why didn&#8217;t you ask him to take off his glasses when you originally saw him?&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s always in the eyes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">I like my men with soft eyes<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Do people realize eyes tell the story of the soul? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Or eyes tell exactly what you&#8217;re feeling at the moment? <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">You can tell by someone&#8217;s eyes if they&#8217;re sinister or not. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just a few days ago at work, I was faced with a demon threatening to rob us, and I was quite scared because I knew he wasn&#8217;t lying at all. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you&#8217;re faced with a demon, you feel their energy immediately, and it&#8217;s dark. You think the girl who you don&#8217;t like is demonic until you meet someone who literally carries the darkness. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">That girl is just unlikeable; that demon &#8211; you stay clear. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">It&#8217;s always in the eyes. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I have to date men with soft eyes. Calmness represented in a feature that makes me feel warm, invited, not scared. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">So, I am single<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I judge men by their conversation and how fast they bring up sex. I judge men who only want casual hookups and tell women, &#8220;How can an attractive woman like you not have any hookups in the last years? I don&#8217;t understand&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">If you&#8217;re still in the mindset that attractiveness equals hookups, then you&#8217;re still in a little boy mindset. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">The money and the title mean absolutely nothing because many fools are successful at being a loser. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Great quality men aren&#8217;t seeking casual sex.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Great quality women aren&#8217;t seeking casual sex. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">And if I got spiritual with you, I&#8217;ll be taking it too far and reminding you that maybe you need to &#8211; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I ain&#8217;t going to go there. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<h2 class=\"wp-block-heading\">It&#8217;s a choice until <em>he<\/em> shows up<\/h2>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Baby, the men before you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Hookup culture losers, with corporate titles and opportunity. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">To be a successful woman seeking a man whose mind isn&#8217;t based on sex, casualties, and wasting time. Or throwing a tantrum when you call out a pattern. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><em>He&#8217;s not like that.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I could take experiences and say, &#8220;Men are annoying, I&#8217;ll be single blah blah blah.&#8221; <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But I know God is preparing me. As my cousin would say, &#8220;You&#8217;re practicing&#8221;. Well, I am done with the pre-trials. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I desire <em>HIM<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I can handle <em>HI<\/em>M.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">When you&#8217;re used to crappy dating and meeting men with bad intentions, you could easily fall into the trap of aloneness.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Just accepting dating isn&#8217;t in your cards. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Or you can easily say, &#8220;That was a practice run; I succeeded by getting right up out of there. God bring me the real deal.&#8221;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Because I am tired.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Maybe <em>HIM<\/em> is still in his practice run; maybe I need to stop giving out my number to the randos and get back in the position of feeling like my one is near, be more intentional. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><strong>MAYBE<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I need to ask God to give me the steps of his arrival, let God set the scene, write the script, and execute. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">&#8220;You&#8217;re 26, just date&#8221;, I tried. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">I am 26, and I want my mate. My one. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">Chandra isn&#8217;t meant for a roster of men; not many men deserve my conversation or even my attention. It&#8217;s built for someone intentional. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">But I am tired of repeating myself. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\">May God bring my one. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<p class=\"wp-block-paragraph\"><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Sorry, you&#8217;re not HIM.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9714,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"wprm-recipe-roundup-name":"","wprm-recipe-roundup-description":"","apple_news_api_created_at":"","apple_news_api_id":"","apple_news_api_modified_at":"","apple_news_api_revision":"","apple_news_api_share_url":"","apple_news_cover_media_provider":"image","apple_news_coverimage":0,"apple_news_coverimage_caption":"","apple_news_cover_video_id":0,"apple_news_cover_video_url":"","apple_news_cover_embedwebvideo_url":"","apple_news_is_hidden":"","apple_news_is_paid":"","apple_news_is_preview":"","apple_news_is_sponsored":"","apple_news_maturity_rating":"","apple_news_metadata":"\"\"","apple_news_pullquote":"","apple_news_pullquote_position":"","apple_news_slug":"","apple_news_sections":[],"apple_news_suppress_video_url":false,"apple_news_use_image_component":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1,376,6],"tags":[956,1009,685,137,311,121,389],"class_list":["post-9667","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-posts","category-lifestyle-content","category-whats-new","tag-august-2026","tag-being-26","tag-c-alilijah","tag-dating","tag-lifestyle","tag-love","tag-relationships"],"apple_news_notices":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v28.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>Why are you single? For the last time by C.Alilijah - The Chandra Alilijah<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Being single is a personal choice until God blesses me with the one. Someone who is trustworthy, kind and ready to be HIM.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/chandraalilijah.com\/index.php\/2026\/08\/28\/why-are-you-single-for-the-last-time-by-c-alilijah\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Why are you single? For the last time by C.Alilijah - The Chandra Alilijah\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Being single is a personal choice until God blesses me with the one. 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